


Dreading Daylight

by Hotchniss_Caryl_0322



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-15
Updated: 2017-01-09
Packaged: 2018-09-08 19:04:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8857258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hotchniss_Caryl_0322/pseuds/Hotchniss_Caryl_0322
Summary: Emily sat on her couch drinking her white wine. A knock at the door surprised her. She made her way over to the door only to look out and see the unit chief. Hotch? She thought to herself. She smiled and opened the door. (Slow burn emotionally. Updates every Tuesday and Thursday, Fluff, and soft smut to begin)





	1. Chapter 1: It begins

All Emily wanted to do was curl up on the couch and just forget about the case. And forget about what had happened on the case and how she had to fake being a couple with Aaron. But, how could she? The way her and he danced in that class made her heart melt. She smiled as she thought of the way he had swayed her through the class then out of nowhere held her tight to him and kissed her forehead as she giggled. It was all an act Em. That’s what she had kept reminding herself of. The unsub was after happy and very much in love couples in the class, they were the only two who showed any affection towards each other. But, the only other “couples” were JJ and Reid and Erin and Rossi. She smiled when she thought of the way he moved how he moved her. It gave her goosebumps. She snapped out of her train of thought and said “wife. wife. wife.”. Just as she said those words a knock at her door surprised her. Setting down her glass of wine and fixing her hair she looked out to see that Aaron Hotchner was on her doorstep. She smiled at herself and opened the door.  
“Hey.” He stated. He looked like a truck had just ran him over for fun.  
“Hi.” Emily responded moving for him to come inside. He stood staring at his feet but finally moving into the brunette’s apartment. He slowly made his way to the couch and sat down. He put his face in his hands. Emily sat next to him and reached over and touched one of his arms  
“What happened?” Emily asked.  
“Hayley and I got into a huge fight and I got in my car and drove around not knowing where to go and then I was here.” Aaron looked at Emily whose eyes shined like stars. “I should go.” Aaron moved to stand up but Emily caught his hand.  
“It’s okay. We don’t have to talk about this. I can get you some wine or a beer and we can talk about something else.” Emily stated with a small smile. Hotch nodded his head and sat back down. Emily got up and got him a glass of wine. She sat on the other end of her couch and turned to look at him handing him the glass of wine. They sat in silence for about 30 minutes. Until he finally asked a simple question.  
“Red or blue”  
“Red” She smiled. “White or black”  
“White” He said looking up from his glass.  
“Whiskey or Tequlia” He smirked.  
“Whiskey when I drink alone. Tequil when I drink with Garcia.” She laughed and for the first time, Emily saw a genuine smile. “Jack or Vodka?” She asked grabbing the bottle of wine from the kitchen counter.  
“Jack when I drink with Morgan and Vodka makes me dance so I don’t drink it much.” Aaron’s smile was small. They went on with these questions until one question came up that Emily was shy to answer.  
“Your biggest regret?” Aaron asked her. They were now closer and fully turned to each other.  
“Not getting to know my siblings. I was 16 when my younger sister was born and 18 when my brother was born. I probably couldn’t tell you their middle names.” Emily took her last drink. “Yours?” Aaron looked her up and down and licked his lips.  
“Only ever being with one woman in my whole life.” Aaron looked at Emily again and leaned over took her face in her hands and kissed her. He kissed her hard taking the breath right out of her. She tried to remind herself of the word wife but, she couldn’t remember it. He set his glass down not breaking their embrace he put his hand on the small of her back and laid her down on the couch getting on top of her and kissing her neck. She let soft moans come out of her mouth. He looked at her.  
“Bedroom?” He said with a smirk. She got up and lead him up the steps. When they reached her bedroom the kisses started again. He pealed off her clothes then his. Then he as fully inside of her and moaned into her mouth and kissed her neck. She bit down on his. She finished right before he did. He fell next to her and put an arm around her brought her close. She smiled into his chest. And fell asleep quickly.  
The next morning she woke up alone. She pulled her knees to her chest and cried.


	2. Not so much guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How will work go after last night

She kept thinking pull it together Emily. He’s married and your boss. She kept telling herself these things over and over again. Knowing that most of the team took the elevator up to the 6th floor so she decided to avoid contact with anyone by taking the steps. She can’t look at her team right now, she could barely look in the mirror. She had no idea what she would do when she saw Aaron. She stopped on the 5th floor and put on the face she made around her mother and all of her mother’s “friends”. She knew how to go un-profiled by her co-workers because she has more secrets then the FBI. She puts on a smile as she walks into the bullpen and sees Derek sitting on her desk.   
“Hey” He says with a smirk.  
“What’s that face for?” Emily said giving him a look of concern.  
“You received a present.” Morgan said with a laugh and then proceeded to move and then Emily saw a bottle of wine with a letter. She smiled but quickly changed her facial expression when she felt eyes starring at her.   
“I will be right back.” She stated grabbing the letter and running to the bathroom. When she got in there she locked the door and leaned up against the sink and opened her letter

Emily,  
I don’t exactly know how to explain myself. I am a married man and I just put my marriage on the line. I am also your boss and I have now put my career on the line. But, I feel no regret in either form. Last night was the best sex I have ever had. I would like to discuss this over lunch and no not in a date way. But, in a way that we won’t be watched. Let me know!  
-Aaron

She smiled at the note but, just as her smile spread she felt her tears. She knew he could never be hers. No matter what happened at lunch. She kicked herself for wanting to go to this lunch. But, she knew she had too. Drying her face and putting on a genuine smile she walked back to the bullpen and put the note into the shreder. It was now into thousands of pieces. Morgan groan which made Emily smile. She saw Aaron watch her shred the note. They made eye contact and she smiled at him which made him return the tiny smile. She walked past Morgan who was trying to profile her and walked right into Aaron's office. She saw Strauss and smiled small. 

"Hey is there anyway you could lunch today? I don't want to eat my frozen lunches." Emily asked Aaron who was quite surprised by her asking.

"Why not go with another co-worker?" Strauss asked the brunette.

"Morgan will hit on every waitress. Rossi will only go to italin places then complain about how non-authentic it is. Reid is Reid. Garcia is amazing but talks too much. And JJ said she can't." Emily responded to the blonde with a smile. Erin nodded then turned to Hotch.

"You and your team will leave at 8 p.m. tonight" Erin said turning to leave and smiling at Emily. Emily turned to leave right behind.

"Hey Emily?" Hotch stopped her. 

"Yeah." Emily smiled stepping back into Hotch's office.

"JJ said no?" He asked.

"Well, technically i didn't ask." Emily smiled leaving the office. Aaron smiled as he watched her walk down the steps and sit at her desk. He watched Morgan make fun of her for the smile she wore and Reid try to analyze her. She put in her earbuds and got to work. About noon time JJ walked passed Hotch's office and noticed his smile.

"What's that smile for?" JJ asked Hotch. Who hadn't stopped smiling since Emily left his office.

"Emily schooled Strauss and it is the highlight of my year." He responded lying. If anything was the highlight it was last night. The way Emily made him feel for those few hours. Even today he still felt happy around her and excited about their lunch in 10 minutes. But, who's counting? JJ walked away and Aaron's phone rang. Emily walked into his office as soon as he picked it up. 

"Hayley?" Aaron said into the phone and Emily's heart dropped to a pit in her stomach. She smiled and walked away. She practically ran to the bathroom, once she was in the she leaned against the sink and put her head into her hands. She cried softly. What am I doing, she thought. He's married and has a small child with his wife. A soft knock on the bathroom door and then she heard his voice.

"Emily?" He asked.

"Yeah Hotch I'll be done in a minute." She couldn't stop herself. "Are we still on for lunch?" She felt her heart drop and then she could feel the lump in her throat and the knife she was stabbing Hayley in the back with.

"Yeah we're still on." Hotch said with a smile.


	3. The Lunch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter will post another tomorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a short chapter will post another tomorrow

She sat across from him. Watching his every move, from the way he talked to the waitress to the way he drank his water, she couldn’t help but admire him. He smiled at her with bright white straight teeth and nice pink lips. 

“Emily you know you’re starring right?” Aaron said with another flash of his smile. She returned the smile with just a little bit of flirtation. 

“Well hen I have you to stare at it hard not to.” Emily put her hand on his forearm and squeased. He smiled at her.

“We have to talk about last night.” Hotch stated. Emily gave him a pout face but he continued. “It can never happen again. Don’t get me wrong it was fantastic and I want it to happen again. Like right now, but I am married and it will be hard enough keeping these bite marks hidden from Hayley I don’t know how I would hide more. You understand right?” Aaron finally looked at Emily who was smiling. He gave her a look and she smiled even more.

“What you just told me is that you want me but can’t have me. Well, I want you too and we work together. These cases can get tough and stressful and with you want me so bad I can feel the heat coming from your crotch, it will happen again. I just don’t know when. But, I wll be waiting for it because trust me, you don’t get bite marks unless you’re good. Now we can drop it and talk about something else like friends or we could go fuck in the bathroom. Which do you want?” Emily said with a smile. Aaron smiled back.

“Are you ready for the case? Its very cold in Montana right now.” Aaron said with a smile. Emily pouted.

“And here I thought I was going to get laid. But, I guess a nice paid for lunch ill do.” Emily smiled as Hotch laughed. 

They talked about the case and life at the office and how things aren't going well for anyone right now. Little do they know things are about to get way worse.


	4. Only borrowed

The case had them all on edge. There were married men with their mistresses killed in the most horrific way. The women were strangled and the men were beaten to death with a bat. All the women had brunette hair and were tall and thin. They fit Emily’s description perfectly and that did not make her feel good at all. She starred at herself in the mirror after the last body Emily stopped talking to Hotch and even went back to calling him Hotch. The guilt had finally caught up with her. He was married it didn’t matter if he was unhappy in his marriage. He was in a marriage. She didn’t know who that person was at the restaurant but she hoped to never be that person again. Especially after this case. She wanted to run to Hayley and apologize a million times. Yet, she knew that, that would make things worse. Hayley could never ever know and neither could Strauss. Emily felt her heart drop when she remembered that Strauss wanted to meet with her when they got back. Emily didn’t know what it was about but, she had a feeling she wouldn’t like it. She wiped the tears from her face when she heard a knock at the door. 

“Yeah JJ I’ll be out in a second.” Emily said breathing heavy. She pushed her hair back behind her ears.

“I’m not JJ” Hotch said walking into the restroom. Emily turned and stared at him as he locked the door. He let out a breath and turned to look at her. “You seem like you need a hug.” He said with a shy smile.

“Yeah. I guess I do, but it can’t be from you.” Emily fought back her urge to hug him. She looked as his smile faded. He looked down at his shoes just like the night that changed her relationship with him. “I want to give you a hug and cry on your shoulder but these women look a whole hell-of-a lot like me. It caused me to think about everything that happened and I regret it now. It has caused me to cry a lot. So, if you excuse me I’m going to go hug my best friend.” Emily walked passed the man whom she wanted to hug and let him hold her. But, she knew that was not an option. She could never share a man. Especially share a man with his wife. She didn’t want to be the other woman, she wanted to be the only woman. She let out a tear as she ran to JJ and hugged her. JJ hugged her back not saying a word.

“Princess what’s wrong?” Derek said. Emily thought about Hotch but, she knew she could never tell anyone about that, so she decided to tell them her parents story.

“These women and men remind me of my parents. My mom cheated on my dad one time while he and I were in Italy. That’s how she got my little sister and it royally sucks to work this case.” Emily lied. Her parents cheated on each other like it was a hobby.

“I’m sorry but, as a request from Strauss 2 of us have to go undercover. So are we drawing straws or voting.” Rossi stated. Hotch looked at him then at Emily then back at Rossi.

“Emily and I will go.” Hotch stated. Emily looked at him. He met her eye and she dropped her head. The team looked at her. JJ moved to hug her again but Emily brushed her off and moved toward the bathroom again. 

“Hotch I don’t think you and Em going undercover is a good idea for her right now. This case is hitting close to home because of her parents. So please reconsider.” JJ begged Hotch. He watched Emily then stood up fully to follow her but, he quickly responded.

“If she can’t get over these feelings then she needs to transfer to a different department.” Hotch coldly said to JJ trying to hide his true emotions. He followed Emily and walked right into the bathroom shooing away the one woman in there and finally closing the door and locking it. He turned to Emily who slapped him across the face.

“I just told you I don’t want this anymore.” Emily said tears running down her face. He looked at her then grabbed her face and kissed her. She fought off the kiss and pushed him away. Emily stared at him then she threw her head in her hands. He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her. She fought him off of her and then gathered herself. “I’ll do this. But, next time talk to me. I’ll go get ready.Please.” She walked away from the bathroom heading towards JJ and put on her fake smile as every stared at Hotch who glared at Emily and she returned the look. 

“He can be a real ass sometimes.” JJ said to Emily as they walked to the locker room for Emily to change. 

“You have no idea.” Emily said just quiet enough for JJ to not hear her. She put on the black dress that barely came to her half thigh. She put her hair up in a curly dew and put on her face. JJ brought her some nice maroon heels. Emily fell in love with them instantly.

“I’m so keeping these.” Emily laughed. She then walked out to the car and drove to agreed meet point a restaurant called Maureec’s, which is where all the victims at before being killed. Emily walked into the restaurant and when Hotch saw her his jaw was almost on the floor. She smiled lightly at him he walked over to her and kissed her. She smiled now fully.

“Careful Mr. Jones. We don’t want wifey to find out.” Emily said with a smile loud enough for a blonde-haired woman to hear and she turned to look at them. “Did she turn?” Emily asked quietly. Hotch turned around and saw the blonde staring so he turned back around and put his hand on Emily’s ass making the woman think he was scouting for his wife. Emily let out a small gasp as Hotch grabbed her ass. She was not ready. After a dinner, full of flirting and mentioning his wife when the blonde came by they went to walk to her car when the blonde tried to bombard them when JJ, Rossi, and Reid came out from behind some cars and Emily arrested her. They put her in the back of the car.

“So, was the feel of Emily’s ass good?” Derek laughed on the way back to the station. 

“Honestly. Yes.” Hotch responded making everyone laugh. The rest of the car ride was full of the whole car making jokes except for Emily who was completely quiet. The whole ride there then moved to the interrogation room. The blonde would not talk to anyone except for Emily.

“I hope you know your boyfriend is only borrowed.” She finally said after about 5 minutes of silence. Emily looked up at her. She then looked back down at her hands.

“We aren’t together. That was to try and get you. We succeeded. But, we are not together in any way.” Emily said staring at the woman who looked Emily right in the eye.

“That’s not what that kiss said.” The blonde said to Emily. Then Emily remembered that she was the blonde from the restroom earlier. The blonde smiled and then stared at the wall. Emily’s heart fell out of her chest. She got up and walked out of the room and went to the locker room to change letting tears stream down her face.


	5. Hayley Knows

Aaron stood in the shower letting the water hit his bite marks, he rubs his hand over them and smiles and thinks about Prentiss. He wonders what she’s doing in this moment. Was she thinking about what Strauss said. What did Strauss say he wondered. He let his thoughts wander but, they were all about Emily. Everything from what she was doing in that moment to what she was going to have for dinner. She wouldn’t leave his mind. Hayley walked into the bathroom. 

“Aaron, what’s taking so long we need to talk about your transfer.” She said with a smile. She loved that Aaron was finally going to have 9-5 job with weekends off. 

“Yeah just trying to clean the bites really good so I don’t get an infection.” He lied trying to get Emily out of his mind but, that wasn’t going to happen. 

“I still can’t believe the unsub bit you. So gross.” Hayley said leaving the bathroom .Aaron smiled at the sound of the door closing he could got back to thinking about Emily and how much he missed her. He finally remembered that Hayley was waiting for him, he then got out of the shower and got dressed in his suit. He walked into his bedroom to find Hayley looking at him with heartache. He looked down at the shirt she as holding and let a tear fall from her dark green eyes.

“What’s this?” She said in an almost whisper. Aaron looked at her confused.

“A shirt?” He answered confused.

“I know it’s a goddamn shirt Aaron! I’m talking about the wine stain on it!” Hayley shouted with broken eyes and heart. Aaron looked down at the floor. Not wanting to make eye contact. “I know you don’t drink wine unless you want to have sex. I haven’t had a drink in 2 years because we were trying and then I was pregnant and now I’m breast feeding Aaron. Who was it?” Hayley was now full on crying and wishing she hadn’t tried to do laundry. Hotch knew he was caught and knew that she was right he only drank wine when he wanted to have sex. He felt wine was sexy and thus only drank it when he wanted to sleep with someone.

“Emily.” He said quietly after about 10 minutes of silence. He knew she would find out soon. She looked defeated. She sat down on the bed and hung her head. 

“How many times?” She asked as he made his way to her. 

“Only once. It didn’t mean anything. We had just fought and I just happened to drive there. She offered me wine and I took it.” Aaron said regretting his it didn’t mean anything because he felt it did mean something. His phone rang and he answered it leaving Hayley with her thoughts. When he came back into the room she was standing and looking at him. 

“I want to go to therapy and you will sleep in the guest room and make your way back to our bed. But, I am not forgiving you. You’re going to take the job and not see her anymore. Go finish this case but I will be surprising you at work to make sure she knows you’re married.” Hayley said then she left the room. Aaron followed saying her had to go to work. He moved to give her a kiss and she put her hand up not letting him anywhere near her or Jack. Once Aaron was gone Hayley grabbed her keys and left. She knew where Emily lived because of Aarons address book. She pulled up the apartment and sat in her car making sure Emily was home. Seeing the black SUV she grabbed Jack and walked up to her floor and knocked on the door. She didn’t know what she wuld say or do but, she knew she had to be here to do this, whatever “this” was. Emily answered the door and quickly wiped the smile off her face.

“Hello.” Hayley said with little to no confidence. 

“Hayley hi. I’m sorry I thought you were the Chinese food guy.” Emily said back nervously.

“I need to come in.” Hayley said coming inside of the apartment. She looked around and then saw the wine on the table. Emily closed the door and moved back into the living room. “Is that where you and my husband had sex?” Hayley asked point to the couch. She put Jack down and turned to look at Emily who was now white as a ghost. “He already told me you two had sex so no need to deny it.” Hayley fiddled with her nail.

“No. We kissed them I led HIM to my bedroom. I initiated everything.” Emily lied. He kissed her first but his wife didn’t need to know that. “If it makes you feel better I feel dirty and gross and sick to my stomach about it. I feel like I am dead inside and like a homewrecker and I hope that someday you’ll forgive me and Hotch.” Hayley scoffed at the end of Emily’s sentence.

“You won’t even call him Aaron? And I will forgive my husband but, never will I ever forgive you.” Hayley said choking back on her words. Emily let a tear fall from her eye. She looked down at the ground until Hayley left. Emily fell to the ground of her kitchen and cried. She fully sobbed at the way Hayley looked at her. She knew she couldn’t face this anymore. She knew what she needed to do. They had given her a few days off due to the way the unsub talked to her. But she grabbed her badge and gun and got dressed. Doing this will be hard she just hoped someone else is in the office so she doesn’t lose it in front of him. She got to the build and walked into the elevator without saying hi back to JJ and Garcia. She didn’t even wave she just rushed to the elevator and pressed 6 she walked into the bullpen ignoring Derek and Reid. She saw Strauss and knew it was now or never. 

“Sir?” Emily stated with a look on her face only described as pain.

“Prentiss, is everything okay?” Hotch asked with concern in his voice. 

“I am resigning. Immedently. I still have interpool connections and that is where I will go. Thank you for this oprotunity.” She went to leave but Hotch spoke up.

“Emily?” He said this time with sadness. The heartache for Hayley because he knew she would kill him for talking to Emily.

“No.” Emily turned to look at him then turned back around and walked to her desk laying her badge and gun on it then leaving the bullpen ignoring all of her friends. She turned back really quick to see Hotch staring at her from inside his office. She got into the elevator and wanted to cry but, she knew that wasn’t and option due to others being in the elevator. She practically ran out to her car and cried. She cried on her way home and at home. She got out her phone and dialed the number she only ever called during the week to make her day better. “Louise?” She sobbed into the phone. “Will you please bring him here. I need to see my son.” She finally said into the phone the irish woman agreed. After about and hour a blonde haired blue eyed 4 year old boy burst into the apartment shouting “Mommy! Mommy!”. Emily smiled and picked up her son and smiled as she kissed him. “I missed you Declan” She said with love in her voice and the first time she had smiled in what felt like days.


	6. Tell me a lie

Hotch paced in his bedroom with the go bag on his bed wondering if what he was about to do was the correct thing. He loves his job. But, he also loves Hayley and his son and… He let himself trail off before he could finish that thought. He didn’t know if it was Emily or the way she felt. He just didn’t know anything anymore. The way his head worked when Emily was around was not the way it typically did. She made him see colors in his typical gray world. He smiled at the thought of the way his red clashed with his typical gray world. The way she gave his sky color made his heart skip a beat. Hayley walked in to find him putting his last set of shirts in his bag. The look on her face could make Pompeii erupt again. 

“What in the fuck is that?” Hayley said pointing to the bag. She looked like she was going to kill him. 

“I’m sorry. I can’t stop doing what I love.” He looked at her and his heart hardened. She didn’t look sad or upset she looked pissed. Like her car was just keyed. 

“You mean to tell me that you’re leaving then your transfer will be complete? Right?” She said with a look that could haunt anyone.

“No. I’m not transferring. I can’t. I can’t do that to my team.” Hotch finished while hanging his head. He knew that he messed up but he couldn’t leave the people he cared about.

“You mean you can’t do that to Emily.” Hayley said then she took off down the hallway and locked herself in Jacks room. He hung his head once more then composed himself and made his way to Emily’s.

Emily sat talking to her son. Bright blue eyes and beautiful bright blonde hair, curly and tangled just the way he looked when she first met him. Her heart skipped a few beats when he asked her to be his mommy. She smiled at the adoption papers above the fridge. She sat Declan down on the counter and started to cook when Louise came in and took the knife and carrots from her.

“Louise I can cook lunch for my son on my own.” Emily said with a laugh. Declan laughed too.

“While we are here you are mom and I am housekeeper. Spend time with your son we don’t know when your phone will ring.” Louise finished just as the doorbell rang. “Or doorbell, I will get it.” Louise went to the door and looked out only to see a dark haired man who looked more the happy to be on Emily’s doorstep. Louise opened the door which caught the man by surprise.

“Hi. Isn’t the Emily Prentiss’s apartment?” He asked. A little more then confused. The woman nodded. “I’m Aaron Hotchner her boss.” 

“You guys have another case? Emily needs to spend time with-“Louise was cut off by Emily asking who was at the door and before Louise could stop him Hotch walked to the kitchen. He turned to see Emily play with a young boy on the counter. 

“Hey.” Hotch says. Emily makes eye contact with him giving him the look of what the hell are you doing here. “Please. Just talk to me.” By now he’s closer to her and Louise is cooking again. 

“Louise how long until dinner is done?” Emily asked coldly. 

“Ten minutes.” She responded.

“You have ten minutes Hotch.” Emily said taking his hand and leading him to her office. She closed the door and locked it behind her. “Louise will try to come in and kill you with in these 10 minutes. I would like you to get back to Hayley in one piece.” Emily let him have a small smile which he returned.

“Come back. Going back to interpool will not be good. We need you, I need you.” He said pulling her close to him and kissing her, she didn’t push him away like she wanted to but, she couldn’t. 

“Okay. If you tell me a lie.” Emily said pulling back. He raised an eyebrow.

“A lie?” He asked. 

“Like you love me or you’ll leave your wife. I know it’s a lie but I want you.” She barely finished with out crying. She knew it was wrong but the way he made her feel was better then anything in this world.

“I’m leaving her.” He stated then he kissed her and sat her on the desk and made her his once more.


	7. Scream

Emily fought back her tears as she sat down on the plane. The window seat was her favorite but right now she hated herself too much to enjoy the view she let a few drops fall. She didn’t even wipe them when he sat down next to her. The man that was just physically inside of her now made her feel dirty. He looked at her with the puppy eyes she couldn’t resist.

“Emily.” He stated calmly. She held her hand up.

“That was the last time and no one can know I have a son understand?” Emily bit back and let more tears fall. She didn’t know if she was crying because of Hotch or Declan or Hayley but the tears came out fast and quick. She couldn’t stop them. Once in the air she ran back to the bathroom, Hotch followed. 

“Emily, talk to me.” He said through the bathroom door. She started to sob. Hotch picked the lock and went in after her. “Emily.” He said as she looked up at him. 

“This is hard Hotch. I don’t know what I was thinking back at my house. Seeing Hayley made her real and I don’t like real. I like the fantasy of lying and pretending. I don’t like the way I feel right now.” Emily said as she tried to gather herself.

“What did she say?” Hotch finally asked after handing her tissues and taking them back to their seats. The flight was almost completely empty making this conversation easy.

“She told me that she will never forgive me and then scoffed at how I would only call you Hotch. She made me feel smaller then a mouse. And I lied to her and the way she looked at me. I never want to be looked at like that again.” Emily said staring blankly at the seat in front of her. He looked at her with sadness in his eyes. 

“What did you lie about?” Hotch asked wanting to hold her hand but knew he couldn’t. 

“That I kissed you. You kissed me is the truth.” Emily responded leaning back into her seat. She couldn’t help but feel discussing like she was dirty and worthless.

“It’s okay I lied to you.” He said in response. She raised an eyebrow at him. “When you said tell me a lie and I said I’m leaving her. I meant it. I’m leaving and it feels fantastic. “He lied to her. He smiled at her and she didn’t know what to say or do. She just kept looking at him like he had just walked on water but she couldn’t turn away from him.

“Did I break you up?” Emily finally choked out when they were about to land. He smiled and grabbed her hand.

“No, she pushed me away long before you and I even met.” Hotch lied. “You’re just a perk, well for me” He smiled like he wasn’t trying to ruin everyone’s lives. He knew what it meant to Emily to know that she didn’t just sleep with a married man. He had left Hayley and gone to her because he wanted her. He does want her but he feels he needs his family. She final smiled and looked to glow. 

“So I only slept with a married man once?” Emily asked with her eyes beaming.

“Yeah.” He responded with a kiss. He knew it was lie but he couldn’t keep watching Emily hurt herself.

“I still feel bad and I don’t want to do that again at least not for a while but, you could still come over when your bed feels too empty.” Emily said with a smile on their way to the sheriff station. She didn’t care about how much she would dread daylight all she cared about right now was that she would have Hotch at night even if it wasn’t in that way. When they walked in their jaws dropped at how Spencer and JJ were screaming at each other and then JJ threw her phone at him. He stormed out.

“God Spence all you ever do I make me scream and yell about everything!” She shouted after him. Strauss walked out of the office where the argument took place and followed Reid outside.

“Trouble in paradise?” Hotch asked. Cocking one eye brow at him JJ smiled.

“No Strauss was just starting to suspect something so we had to throw her off.” JJ laughed as did Emily and Hotch as they walked back to the office to finish the geological profile. Before they knew it, they had the unsub in custody and were on their way home. Reid sat on one end of the jet and JJ sat on the other stealing glances every now and then. Emily was fast asleep next to Hotch when he got up and walked to the bathroom Rossi watched. He got up and followed him grabbing a cup of coffee as Hotch went into the restroom dialing a phone number. Rossi smiled thinking that he and Hayley were no longer on the rocks. He went back to Strauss who was now falling asleep and Rossi followed suit. Hotch on the other hand was ready to talk all night long, to Hayley.

“Hey Hayley please just listen. I know that you want me to have a desk job but, I can’t do that right now. My team needs me but, I can train someone to take my place it just might be awhile.” He said hoping she hadn’t already hung up.

“What about her?” Hayley choked out getting ready to cry.  
“Derek and she are together. He’s all over her and won’t let her go or out of his sight for longer than an hour. And I was just drunk there are no feelings there.” He lied into the phone. He could picture Hayley’s smile as she agreed to stay. His heart beamed. He had Emily and Hayley no one would get hurt this way. At least he thinks no one will get hurt. When he got back out to his seat Emily was sitting next to JJ, who was fighting back tears and staring at Reid who was on his phone with a mystery woman. It wasn't an act anymore he actually had a girlfriend and he told JJ it was over. Emily looked at Hotch who smiled smally and Emily returned it pulling out her phone and texting him. 

My house tonight? she asked.

of course. he responded with a smile.

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written in while and please leave feedback i live for it


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